Nowadays, there are many celebrities who are famous for their glamour and wealth rather than achievements and this sets a bad example for young people.

Practice this IELTS Writing Task 2 question on IELTSX. Nowadays, there are many celebrities who are famous for their glamour and wealth rather than achievements and this sets a bad example for young people.

Celebrities Famous Glamour Wealth Not Achievement Bad Example - IELTS Writing Task 2

You should spend about 40 minutes on this task.

To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Write at least 250 words.

A student's answer to this task, and the feedback on it

Written by an IELTSX user under exam conditions and published unedited and anonymously. Band 8.5 · 283 words.

It is true that celebrities are not always recognized for their genuine accomplishments, but rather for their physical attractiveness and material wealth, thereby setting a negative example for the younger generation. I largely agree with this idea, although there are notable exceptions.

One key reason for this trend is the widespread influence of social media platforms. Public figures frequently promote an unrealistic and materialistic lifestyle, encouraging their audience to seek rapid fame through their carefully curated online content. As a result, young people may be directly or indirectly influenced, often overlooking the true definition of success, which is ultimately based on hard work and genuine commitment.

Furthermore, platforms such as Instagram serve as a pertinent example, where certain social media influencers encourage others to imitate them by showcasing rented luxury mansions and cars, often resulting in considerable financial strain. This type of content reinforces the idea that success is measured by outward appearance rather than meaningful achievements.

Notwithstanding these arguments, not all celebrities are merely superficial figures. Many are genuinely talented individuals who have achieved recognition through dedication and hard work, particularly in fields such as acting and music. For instance, Tom Holland is widely regarded for his professional acting skills, having attained success through years of rigorous training and experience. Such figures can serve as positive role models by demonstrating perseverance and commitment. However, these individuals often receive less attention than those who promote glamorous lifestyles, meaning their influence is comparatively limited.

In conclusion, although some celebrities serve as positive role models, the increasing emphasis on glamour and material wealth is likely to reinforce superficial standards of success, ultimately shaping young people’s values and behaviour in detrimental ways over the long term.

Examiner feedback

This is an exceptional piece of writing that demonstrates a near-native command of English. The score of 8.5 is awarded because while the linguistic control is Band 9, the Task Response—specifically the depth of the argument regarding 'how' these examples are bad for youth—could be slightly more profound to reach the highest possible band.

Task Response - 8

- The response sufficiently addresses all parts of the task, explicitly linking the lack of achievements in celebrities to the negative influence on youth. - Ideas are well-developed; the student explores social media's role and distinguishes between superficial fame and genuine talent. - To reach Band 9, the essay could have explored more nuanced behavioral consequences for young people, such as the impact on mental health or specific career aspirations.

Coherence & Cohesion - 9

- Paragraphing is managed skillfully, with a logical flow from the cause of the trend to specific examples and finally a counter-perspective. - Cohesive devices (e.g., 'Notwithstanding these arguments,' 'thereby,' 'meaning their influence is comparatively limited') are used so naturally they attract no attention. - Transition between the 'influencer' culture and the 'traditional' celebrity achievement is seamless.

Lexical Resource - 9

- Uses a wide range of vocabulary with sophisticated control (e.g., 'carefully curated,' 'pertinent example,' 'superficial figures,' 'detrimental ways'). - Collocations are extremely natural and precise throughout the entire essay. - There are no noticeable errors in spelling or word formation.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy - 9

- Demonstrates a wide range of structures with full flexibility, including complex subordinate clauses and participial phrases. - The majority of sentences are error-free; the writing flows with the natural rhythm of a native speaker. - Punctuation is used accurately to enhance clarity and tone.

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